Life Ruiner

by Mandy Weger on August 12, 2011

Last night, I got a very interesting/funny comment on my wedding blog, Bride Junk, from a vendor we had considered for our wedding. We visited this winery in the fall of 09, and I wrote my comprehensive review of wineries in the NJ/PA area in January of 10.

(This is just an excerpt from the lengthy response found here. I can’t help but laugh at the desperation/bad spelling)

I’m sorry to hear that you thought our wines were so ‘terrible’ that it ruined your plans for hosting a wedding. May I ask what wines you tried? Valenzano Winery produces a wide variety of wines for ALL tastes. If you are a California Cabernet drinker you obviously arent going to enjoy our Shamong Red. [...] If you were offered the appropriate style of wine and you still thought it was ‘terrible’, it is typically appropriate to list what you didnt like about the wine rather than throw generalized and generic insults that really dont explain the wines. All of our wines are certified and approved as ‘quality’ and lack any flaws. Professionals and scientist certify this for us.

If you didnt like our wines, than your dislike is ‘subjective’ and it would be great if you could be more specific such as ‘the merlot was too high in acidic acid” or the vidal is ‘lakes necessarily tannns’, etc… This is much more helpful to us and your readers, and certainly less more insulting. [...]

Thanks for your help and congratulations on your wedding!

Now, the only reason this winery would bother with this response is if they feared my review would impact business, right? Well, “Valenzano Winery Wedding” in a google search turns up my little post as the #4 result. Oops.

I have to admit: I wasn’t trying to be diplomatic at all. I said the wines were “terrible” and I stand by that. I vividly remember trying every. single. wine. they offered and turning to Mike with an “uh, no” face. The wines in this area simply aren’t that good. I have nothing against them for their business…I just choose not to purchase it, drink it, and I chose not to have my wedding there for that reason. It might not be an eloquent reason, but that was my reason for not having our wedding there. Even they have to admit that their $15 merlot is not the best quality we could have gotten for that price, right?

The wine aside, It got me thinking about the amount of reviews I gave as a wedding blogger & I wonder how my reviews have affected the businesses that (we considered) were sub-par. We had extremely high standards when planning our wedding, we had a unique vision, and we weren’t going to settle for a place that didn’t have the organization skills to carry out what we wanted. We wanted something special for our guests, and our pickiness paid off: Ladder 15 was the best possible venue and staff that we could have found. Ever.

To this day, if David Sturno googles himself, he’ll see my scathing review of the treatment he gave us when we were ready to book our wedding at R2L. In fact, I’m the #1 google hit. Part of me feels bad until I remember the condescending, shit-eating smirk he gave me when I mentioned to him that I was a blogger and would be happy to give R2L glowing reviews if we could have our wedding there.

I don’t feel bad for using whatever power I have as a blogger to push businesses to achieve higher quality. I think this is the world we live in right now, and I’m not out writing false reviews. I’m giving my honest opinion on each business as I see it. Could they be worded more diplomatically? Yes. Should I remove them for that reason? No. They’re true to my experiences.

It does remind me that perhaps I should use these powers for good, too. I should give credit to the businesses who are doing a great job, and I think I’ve tried to do that with Ladder 15 and Tria, both quality Philly businesses that are incredibly close to my heart.

So what do you think? Would you use your blogging powers for good and/or evil? If you’ve written bad reviews in the past, do you feel bad about it later, or are you happy you did it?

Pin It

http://twitter.com/MintedLife Kelsey L

My DJ sucked at the wedding and I wrote an honest review about him, but not on my blog. Although I really thought about it. Also, my photographer never gave me an album that I PAID for, and I didn’t write about that either. I don’t know what is wrong with me. I hate conflict though, so maybe that’s why.

[Reply]
Anonymous

Awesome post! And I totally agree about giving an honest review of business. I hope that I have saved a couple people from falling into the same pitfalls as I did while planning.

[Reply]
http://thehandcraftedlife.blogspot.com/ Morgan

Wow, they have scientists taste their wines? (rolls eyes)

As an avid reviewer on trip advisor for years, and gung-ho internet researcher of everything, I really value reviews. Especially on blogs, because usually they’re accompanied by more of the story of the experience, than just the bare bones facts. I’m sure your reviews of the wedding venues you looked at have helped a lot of brides! And that winery’s response (so late after the fact too) is only going to hurt them, bringing more google hits to your review. Who are they to tell you how to review their wines anyway. If you didn’t like it, you didn’t like it, you don’t have to justify why. It seems more often than not, when I see rebuttals to honest but negative reviews, it just solidifies in my mind that the review was accurate.

[Reply]
Valenzano Winery Reply:
August 18th, 2011 at 12:30 pm
yes, it is common procedure for commercial wineries to send their wines to labs where they are broken down and analyzed for any flaws. This is the problem with amateur bloggers- your opinions far exceed your knowledge base.

[Reply]
Mandy Reply:
August 18th, 2011 at 12:42 pm
Actually, Morgan and I have both blogged for the national wedding blog, Weddingbee, where it receives over 400,000 hits per day. Amateur or not, it seems like people listen to our opinions, and your business would do well to recognize the power that has instead of belittling us. Lucky I didn’t post my review of your winery to THAT blog, huh?

[Reply]
Valenzano Winery Reply:
August 18th, 2011 at 12:51 pm
That would certainly qualify you to comment on our wedding and event facilities. I’m just not seeing the connection to wine…

killer b. Reply:
August 18th, 2011 at 2:13 pm
Wow, looks like SOMEBODY here is a bit of a bully, eh? If she’s so “unqualified” as you say, why do you care so much if she doesn’t like it? Shouldn’t only wine snobs love your incredibly scientific, esoteric wines?? Do your business a favor and back off now. You’re only making yourselves look worse. A GOOD business would be striving to make this situation better by offering a new tasting experience for a second review, not bullying a blogger and her readers by saying how stupid we all are. Good thing I just drink the box stuff. God forbid I piss off the winos!

Melissa Reply:
August 18th, 2011 at 3:11 pm
I completely agree with @80d383a996b21501204f37642bc2d58d:disqus – you CLEARLY care about the review or you wouldn’t be here commenting.

Why not offer a better experience in exchange for another review? If you have nothing nice to say, don’t come commenting on someone’s blog. You are making your business look childish and as if it insults anyone who speaks negatively about you. If that’s the image you want your business to have, more power to you, but everybody else thinks you look like an idiot.

Also every comment you leave with your name? Just bumps this post (and your rude comments) higher on Google.
http://www.facebook.com/people/Michelle-Roth/1064955779 Michelle Roth

I agree Mandy! We went on a trip last week to TN and I wrote reviews on trip adviser about all the places we had visited….people should know what they’re getting into before they have a bad experience or to say hey this is the best place to go let’s go!

[Reply]
http://profiles.google.com/melinda.draffin Melinda Draffin

I just think you should try to be less more insulting. whatever that means.

In any case- I absolutely value online reviews/blogs! Reading them is a huge part of any online research I do when thinking about a purchase. Blog on…

[Reply]
Anonymous

Reading real reviews is really important to me, especially when it comes to places to stay on vacation. Even though some things are nit picky, some things are very good information to have.

The first vendor we wanted to book for our ceremony music fell off the face of the planet. I blogged about it, but left his name out. If anyone asks, I have no problem saying how I really feel about that guy but for some reason I chickened out of using his name online.

[Reply]
http://allieseverydayadventures.blogspot.com/ Allie

I’m debating on this right now, as to whether or not to recap vendors on Weddingbee. Most of the people we worked with I would absolutely work with again, but I don’t know if it’s worth posting names of the companies I wouldn’t work with again. I never bothered with the places we didn’t choose.

[Reply]
http://twitter.com/loverenovations Amanda

I think this is a great post, and I think that it’s important to be honest about the businesses you work with! I also think there’s nothing wrong with being a little un-diplomatic if you feel strongly enough.

[Reply]
Nicolette Gendron

Use your blogging for for good – expose the bad, praise the great. It’s part of your responsibility, I think. I went through this thought process when it came time to review Finger Lakes wineries from our ’09 trip. We had some really good wine but there were a few craptastic places, one of which I really let loose on. It’s a fine line between writing a harsh review and not wanting to mislead by sugar-coating a bad experience (worse IMO). I’m glad you wrote honestly because I can steer clear of a winery I know I would not enjoy.

[Reply]
Valenzano Winery Reply:
August 18th, 2011 at 12:39 pm
The reality is that thousands of people visit Valenzano Winery each year and absolutely LOVE Valenzano wines. Valenzano Wines have won dozens of local and national awards over the past 15 years and one of the most popular wineries on the east coast. Of course, some people have different tastes, and one winery isnt going to please everyone. This is why you should always visit wineries that have free tasting rooms and let you choose for yourself what wines you like or dont like. Valenzano Winery always tells its customers “not to be concerned with the dozens of awards it has won – find a wine that you like for your self and stop worrying about everyone else’s opinion”. The reality is that most wine tasting is subjective and what is good for 99% of people, isnt always good for the gander.

Judge for yourself – especially when it comes to ‘taste’.

[Reply]
Mandy Reply:
August 18th, 2011 at 12:47 pm
I’m sure many people LOVE Valenzano wines, just as they LOVE Beringer White Zinfandel. Good for you guys for making wines that the average American likes. Unfortunately, 99% of people in the United States think that Yellowtail and Gallo wines are perfectly acceptable. I don’t blame you for making wines that average people like, and you shouldn’t blame me for having higher standards than average.

[Reply]
Valenzano Winery Reply:
August 18th, 2011 at 12:54 pm
I would like to challeng you to a blind test. You bring 4 wines that you rate highly. We will put them in a brown bag with one Valenzano Wine wines and then we will have a tasting and post the results here. We will than see how much you really know about wines and how superior your pallet is to ours. Up for the challenge? I would make a $500 donation to the charity of your choice if you can distinguish the Valenzano Wine from any ‘elite’ wine of your choice? What do you think?

Valenzano Winery Reply:
August 18th, 2011 at 1:11 pm
Come on.. $500 to your favorite charity and all you have to do is prove you our wines aren’t up to your standards!!! How can someone as confident as you turn that down?

Anonymous Reply:
August 18th, 2011 at 1:26 pm
Wow. You really need to just drop this. You realize that you are only looking more like an ass, right?

As a blogger and a bride I would have never book with you after seeing the way you behave.

Melissa Reply:
August 18th, 2011 at 3:13 pm
And again, I’ll go ahead and agree with @techsavvywife:disqus … you look like a complete ass. Even in offering money to charity, you manage to sneak in an insult about Mandy and her “confidence.”

It’s actually ridiculous that you’re continuing to argue on a blog post. Awesome PR for your company!!

Movistar26 Reply:
August 18th, 2011 at 1:11 pm
But one of the points here is that it is ONE bloggers OPINION. That would never stop me…an “average” American from at least trying it. Also, I’m sure most…if not all of your readers are “average” Americans.
Steph C

You know I actually never really thought about using my bloggy powers, especially to mention that you would write a great review of the place – I think I should start That being said, I find that winery’s response pretty hysterical. There’s nothing wrong with not liking something, and as far as I can tell, you did give valid reasons for why you wrote an unfavorable review. Personal reviews are how I found almost all my wedding vendors!

[Reply]
Movistar26

I enjoy blogs of all types. But I do agree that when saying something is “terrible” you should be a little more specific. Especially when it comes to wine. Wine tasting is very subjective as everyone’s palettes are unique. I have tasted Valenzano’s wines as well as countless others from NJ, and in my taste, they all vary significantly. So although it is your opinion, it would be even more helpful to describe exactly what you liked and didn’t like about wine, venues, businesses, etc.

[Reply]
Valenzano Winery

Again, we have no problem with an harsh review. As long as it an intelligent review. A review without specifics isnt. This is the problem we have with yours. If you are going slander a business please be specific. I’m certain that a large percentage of your readers would enjoy our wines. I would bet on it. Unfortunately, if they listen to your generalities, they wont ever have the opportunity.

[Reply]
Valenzano Winery Reply:
August 18th, 2011 at 1:06 pm
??

[Reply]
Anonymous Reply:
August 18th, 2011 at 1:16 pm
Arguing with a blogger on her blog is doing more to slander your business than the review she gave. Just sayin…

[Reply]
Valenzano Winery Reply:
August 18th, 2011 at 1:17 pm
$500 going to a needy charity is worth any bad publicity.

[Reply]
Sarah Fletcher Reply:
August 18th, 2011 at 1:26 pm
Serioulsy…you’re bordering on harrassment at this point. As said above…you’re doing more to slander your own business then she ever did. I checked out some reviews on Yelp…some favorable…some not so much. How come you aren’t harrasing those folks??

And “$500 going to a needy charity is worth any bad publicity” is not an accurate statement. Just cause you gave money to a charity doesn’t make your product any better.

Mandy Reply:
August 18th, 2011 at 1:43 pm
While $500 to charity would be nice, I’m going to decline your offer since I do not condone businesses bullying negative reviewers for giving an honest opinion.

Amanda Reply:
August 18th, 2011 at 9:34 pm
I am absolutely appalled at how a business that seems to care so much about their public image could possibly think it was appropriate to attack a blogger so publicly and in such a petty manner. As many others have said, I tend to take any wine review with a grain of salt because everyone has a different palette (as you mentioned yourself), and so I very likely would have tasted your wines with or without the review. However, I take customer service very seriously and I would never support or give money to a business that behaves so unprofessionally. In the future, I will make sure to avoid your wines and, just to make sure we’re clear, it’s because of your behavior – not at all because of her review.

Wine Consumer Reply:
August 18th, 2011 at 1:33 pm
Even having read the negative review on this blog, I most likely would have still tried a Valenzano Wine had the opportunity arisen. Unfortunately for you, the incredibly unprofessional response to this conversation has guaranteed that I will specifically avoid your wines in the future. You have done far more to harm your image than the original post ever could have.

[Reply]
The Lazy Gourmet Reply:
August 18th, 2011 at 4:23 pm
Mandy and Mike have excellent taste in wine. I’ve gone to their home for tastings, and the wines they pick are always delicious, varied and interesting. If Mandy only said your wines were terrible, then she was probably doing you a favor because she’s VERY capable of ripping your wines to shreds and telling you EXACTLY what’s wrong with them. Would you have rathered she gave a detailed review of WHY your wines are gross? You were better off not saying anything and letting her post fade into internet oblivion than stirring the conversation back up-firstly.
Secondly, I remember when Mandy came back from your winery. She told me that they tried dozens of wines because they so enjoyed your facility that they really WANTED to find at least a few wines that they liked so they could justify having their wedding there.Thirdly, giving an honest opinion isn’t slander. Slander is only applicable if the statement given is false. Her statement wasn’t false, it was just her opinion.Here’s another opinion for you: I find your attacks on this blog to be petty and mean spirited, and even though I’m no wine connoisseur, I’d sooner poor your wines down the drain than support a business who would be so publicly cruel to someone who simply didn’t enjoy your wine.Finally: Bravo to Mandy for not playing into this bully’s hands and declining their ridiculous offer. I’m positive that she would win your petty, play-ground challenge and I’m sure it took a lot for her to decline the offer and show you up. That’s called “Being the bigger person,” Valenzano. You should try it some time; maybe by donating the money to charity anyway-as an apology for harassing a customer publicly on the internet.

[Reply]
Carla / Mrs. Meerkat Reply:
August 18th, 2011 at 4:53 pm
That is an awesome idea!

[Reply]
Galen

If this winery spent half as much time working on their wines as they did harassing bloggers for their honest opinions, I am sure their wine would be much better.

[Reply]
FC

Mandy, if you didn’t like a cake at a tasting and blogged about it, I would value your opinion on that cake. Maybe many other people like it, but I would be interested in why you didn’t like the cake. Maybe it’s not “buttercreamy enough” or “fluffy enough”. Wording can vary greatly. If it’s simply, terrible cake… I would believe you.

So ahem, maybe it’s wine and not cake. Not much difference, it’s still something you want at a wedding. And if the cake maker/winery owner was rude to you during your tasting, this is definitely something legitimate that brides planning should know.

I would never trust a venue like Valenzano Winery if they harass potential customers like this. I will avoid and recommend others to avoid them for their lack of professionalism and common courtesy that I expect from venue managers.

[Reply]
http://twitter.com/SheLikesRuffles Katie C

So many thoughts here, and after reading the comments, I must chime in:

Screw whether or not the wine is good. Seriously. I don’t really care: wine preference is subjective. Personally, I only trust the opinions of others who have a similar pallete to mine (ex- my dad and I pretty much like the very same things, but my husband has a completely different taste when it comes to wine. If my dad recommends a bottle he’s enjoyed, I listen). So, wine reviews I tend to take with a grain of salt, unless I know that I share similar taste to the reviewer.

Anyway, what I DO care about is customer service. Valenzano Winery does not only produce wine, they are also a part of the service industry. And…part of that product includes the way they treat their customers. The wine could be the best in the entire world, but if I’m treated poorly, you better believe that I will not be interested in the product. And why should I? Seeing the way Valenzano Winery has responded to this post has put a bad taste in my mouth; there were so many better ways to go about responding to a poor review about them. How about “I’m so sorry you didn’t enjoy our wines. We noticed you didn’t list any specific reasons as to what you disliked about the varities you tasted: we would love to get some feedback, as improving our product is always a goal we strive to meet.” Instead….blog harrassment has ensued. I’d recommend that they brush up on their customer service skills before dealing with any other negative reviewers…

[Reply]
Anonymous

Ummm that winery would be much better served by SEOing your negative review out of their Google results, rather than acting wackadoo. I am supposing that they aren’t very web-savvy, which seems to be proven from the way they are responding to your blog posts and the lack of SEO knowledge. Like others said, wine taste can be subjective – if you don’t like a place, I may try it out anyway… but if they start acting wild and wooly, that’s a whole different matter. No thanks.

[Reply]
Sara

Wow. Was that wacky. While I would find a bit more of a descriptive review on what you did not like helpful, since I agreed with your Finger Lakes recs I have an idea of the sort of wine you enjoy. But that’s honestly way beyond the point. The winery’s reaction is off the reservation.

[Reply]
Ker

Mandy – just so an FYI if you go to the google reviews page for this winery there are now 17 new reviews, all 5 stars that have been posted in the past 2 days – which in my opinion is quite suspicious. My concern for you is one of the poster names is Mandy and there is a positive review given – obviously not you, but someone may be trying to give the impression it is.

[Reply]
Sharin

Bloggers beware..some bloggers may have alterior motives to steer potential customers to business where they may benefit in some way!!! I do like the wines in this area, including Valenzano’s Winery. The banquet facilities and customer service far exceeded my expectations. Funny how some people don’t like to support business in the area they reside. I guess that’s why my friend from California doesn’t particularly care for the wines in her area and frequently requests me to send her fine wines from Valenzano’s.

[Reply]